Thursday, March 12, 2009

MLS is Evil! A conspiracy against Miami by Burrito, with Video

MLS is ready to start its new season and will soon announce the name of the 2 new teams that will play in the league in 2011 (Probably Portland and Vancouver, whoopee for those putos!).
Burrito can't be happy for them, Burrito is mad! It should have been Miami, pero nos chingaron 'estilo perrito' once again!
Burrito hate MLS! Burrito yells it to the 4 winds!
Why? Here is why... click over highlighted thingies if you no understand Spanglish:

Uno - In 1998, Burrito, (who at time lived in Homestead, Florida) was happy to hear MLS was coming to South Florida. But Burrito think team was going to be in Orange Bowl. Pero they instead put team up in Broward! 50 miles from where Burrito live! Ay Chihuahua! At least we have a team!

Dos - (that mean numbers 2 for you no Espanish espeakers) Burrito take bus and train up to Lockhart Stadium! It take sometimes 2 hours cause Burrito no have moneys to buy car. Burrito used to sneak in to stadium, where a quesadilla with extra queso for the security man was good enough for admission, no problema!

Tree - Burrito do everything for Fusion, like yelling and fighting with opposing fans over which hair products Valderrama used to use and singing with Afusionados until Burrito lose voice but one day Ray Hudson even get mad at Burrito for yelling at player who make wrong pass, Burrito think Ray was going to come up to stand and fight him! ( Pero, Burrito think he can take Ray, mano a mano!)

Cat - (that how you say 4 in French! Meow!)

Sorry, Burrito take break to go eat Taco de ojo! Si, Taco of eye! Okay, where was Burrito? Oh yeah!

V - In 2001 after Miami have best season ever, winning Supporters Shield for best record in MLS, MVP in Alex Pineda Chacon and having attendance go up 50%... MLS decide to close team because stupid owner no have enough money!

That day was the worst feeling in Burrito's history! Los Pinches Putos nos chingaron! All Burrito have was the Miami Fusion! If it wasn't for the Mexican League and mami back in Toluca, Mexico Burrito would have died carnales!

Then 2009 came, almost 8 years later, an eternity for a futbol fan, MLS with Barcelona 'make up this story' they wanted MLS team in Miami. This was only conspiracy by MLS to hurt Miami fans feelings, almost like going to Taco Bell and some puto tell you "is on me ese, no worries, order what you want" and then you say que rico! Gimme #4 (the pinche Stuffed Grilled Burrito con steak!) and then when it's time to get it the homeboy (MLS) say "Sorry you no gonna get it!". What the F@c% MLS!

Will Miami ever have an MLS team? Burrito don't know. But if one day Burrito win Lottery Burrito use all money for team!

So it's like Burritos Mami say: "Orale Burrito, en estos dias dificiles de crisis economica tienes que pensar que todo va a estar bien, aver, come mijito, come tu taquito con carnitas y no te olvides de ponerle chile!" Translation: "Everything gonna be alright"

Now Burrito leave you with video that make him feel better, you watch or Burrito hit you on head with quesadilla!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

MLS continue to ignore that MLS need to have a team in Florida. Two more team in the West coast. Garber you are evil!!!

Burrito said...

Si, Burrito no get it either carnal... everyone hate Miami cause we have all the hot mamacitas! Pinches culeros!

Anonymous said...

Ed we need for soccer fans in Miami to wake up. We will never get MLS if we don't show MLS that we want it. I guaranty you if Miami did what Portland did we will be one of the expansion cities in 2011. Most of us sit on our hands and do nothing. All the Latins that love soccer, but don't come out and support Miami pro soccer is something I just don't understand.I say send many e mail to Claure and let him know that we want MLS.Lets start a bring MLS to Miami campaign.

Uncle Ed said...

It's true Pablo, Miami Fans suck.
I just read a New York times Interview with Garber and he states he only received one email from Miami complaining about the loss of the Barcelona deal.
The Ultras seem to be the only group we have out there that cares, we need to support Miami FC.

Anonymous said...

Miami need to wake up. We have so many soccer fans that just don't do anything to help. I don't care from what county you come from if you love soccer and live in Miami. support your team. If we want to see MLS we need to show it.Go and join a supported club and help.